Life Lessons I Am Learning In My 30’s
I’m only 3 years into the 30’s club but my life has been so much better since I hit my 30’s. They say 30’s are the new 20’s and I have to disagree. Life in my 20’s was filled with college papers, traveling every chance I got, learning myself, wasting my time with stupid boys, a little bit of partying, making dumb decisions and some wise decisions, and realizing I needed therapy for being a fatherless child. My 20’s were rough but I don’t regret anything. My 20’s is what helped me to prepare for life in my 30’s and I must say I feel so much better. I haven’t been in the 30’s club for too long. Just a good 3 years and here is what I’ve learned thus far:
It’s okay to let go of old friends and make new ones. Over the past few years the people who I thought would be in my life are either no longer in my life or they’re not around in the same capacity as before. But guess what, that’s okay. Everyone isn’t supposed to be here in every season. I have learned that people will simply grow a part due to life changes, career changes, interest change, and it’s nothing wrong with that. The other piece to that is don’t be afraid to make new friends. I’m pretty sure the majority of people are reluctant about bringing new people into their personal space. I know I have. I still struggle with it. I was never one who needed a ton of friends or a ton of people around. Even my granny said I was okay with being by myself as a kid. So as an adult I’m the same however I am skeptical about bringing new people into my space. I’m a very open person but I am also very private and I love intimate relationships. I’m a quality over quantity type of person. All of the friends that I have now all were former photography clients and we created a bond.
Take your finances more serious if you haven’t done so already. I started my financial wellness journey when I was in high-school. You’re probably like Mena, how? I worked in high school and I was blessed to have a mom and grandparents who poured into me. I literally remember my papa allowing me to count the cash that was in his wallet. I knew financial wellness was important but I didn’t realize how important it was until I purchased a home. If my finances were not in order I would not have been able to purchase a home. My taxes were filed, my credit score was 760, and I had the money saved up. The interesting thing is that I didn’t think I was going to be able to move because this was during the pandemic and on the road to a recession. The housing market for bBuyers was not the best and my agent informed me that people were paying way over market value. So let’s just I was a tad bit discouraged but I always knew that what’s meant for me God would make a way. After looking at two houses the second one was mine. What they say, “Stay ready so you don’t have to be ready.” I was able to secure it because I pretty much had everything in place such as bank statements, proof of income, taxes, etc. I’m not a financial expert so my advice to you would be to find a financial advisor, accountant, and to start reading financial literacy books such as Rich Dad Poor Dad.
Protect your time and energy by saying no. You don’t have to attend every single event or engagement you’re invited too. There was a point in my mid-twenties when I was trying to attend just about every major party. I wanted to skate every Friday for college night. I was trying to attend all of the networking events and workshops. Now that I am 33 I am very picky on where I want to go. Not because I don’t think it will be a good event but more so understanding the season I am in. I am in the season of prioritizing where I spend my time and energy. I am in the season of building and expanding my territory which involves time, energy, and money. I have learned to say no and not feel bad about it. I have to protect where I spend my time by enforcing boundaries on others and myself. Here are some examples, I don’t always answer the phone just because someone is calling. I pass up on going to parties and stay in the house to work on my priorities wether that Is saving money or spending my time wisely. I limit how much tv I watch and I make sure to time block my days so I can be as productive as I possible. I don’t always get it right however, I am very intentional with protecting my peace, time, and energy.
I have learned so much while being apart of the 30’s club but making new friends, taking care of my finances, and protecting my time just hit a little differently. I just turned 33 about 7 days ago and I must say this year life has really been life’n. Buying a home, family issues, navigating a new relationship, getting my business foundations in order; it’s been a lot but what do you? Keep going and take it one day at a time. I know year 33 will take me on another rollercoaster but it’s okay that’s what life is all about, adventures, some good and some not so good. My plan as always is to trust God, enjoy the journey, and to continue to do good work and be a good person. Cheers to another year around the sun.